Sunday, August 8, 2010

You're Fired!

Today when I walked into the office, I put my purse in the desk drawer as usual, turned on my computer, and headed to the kitchen to make green tea. Except, today I was met with the smell of something burning. I looked around the kitchen, but didn't see anything just sitting there flaming (after all - I don't work with Adam Lambert). I looked into the microwave oven, and sure enough, there were two small, very black lumps on the tray. I immediately opened it (just a crack), and determined that they had formerly been two chocolate chip cookies.

I knew it had to be our associate attorney - he burns stuff in the toaster oven on a weekly basis. Usually it's around lunch, so we know to buzz him when the entire office smells like burning pepperoni pizza, or newly chocolate english muffins. He then comes in, sighs, laughs ruefully, and says that he "really has been meaning to buy a little egg timer for that stupid toaster oven." He then eats his charcoal-icous delight, and burns something a week later.

Today though, it was 8:00 am, and there were already burning cookies in there. If your life requires two warm chocolate chip cookies on a Monday morning by 7:45 am, it's pretty sad. If you forget that you wanted those cookies by 8:03, I don't think it's that sad. I think you just wanted cookies. Still though, it's a little awkward to buzz your coworker and say "um, hey doofus. I know you were hoping for a sugar high this morning, but your pre-breakfast dessert is now toast. Or rather, it's burned like toast. Because you left it in the toaster oven too long." After all, there was a microscopic chance I was wrong about the owner of the cookies. So, I decided that if no one had claimed the burned baked goods by 8:10, I was calling our associate attorney.

Luckily, about 8:07, who comes strolling into the kitchen, but the master of the toaster oven, the associate attorney. He didn't say anything, I didn't say anything. I waited until he got back to his office, and then I laughed.

How does this relate to economics you ask? Well, if you need to buy a timer, you should buy a timer. The $5 it'll cost you to buy a timer will, in one month, save you two burned cookies, one burned english muffin, one burned piece of pepperoni pizza, and one burned turkey sandwich. It will also save you the humiliation of being known as the guy who can't work a toaster oven. It will save your coworkers (and any debtors/clients who come in) from having to smell the too-toasty version of your food. As Michael Scott would say, a timer is a win-win-WIN. Or, without the timer, you could continually burn things, and risk getting fired. Ba-da-chhhhh.

I lamented the fate of those two cookies in:
Grayish pencil skirt, olive green three-quarter-length sleeve eyelet jacket, black lace tank, peacock feather earrings, gold owl necklace, antique-inspired charm bracelet, and black and gray menswear-inspired pumps.


  1. Because you stuck the Office reference in there, it reminded me of "The Fire" episode. It's a perfect fit.